Feeling these images a lot today. Desperate for sex - the ache is especially strong right now. Even just to be naked on the floor, underneath a heel right now would be satisfying.
I struggle with this desperation. I want to beg for relief, but I think that begging just makes things worse. At least with my wife it does.
It's the waiting that's the killer. Even though I really don't have time to be doing tease sessions every night, I really, really want to. There are times when I start thinking seriously that I want higher intensity in this experience (and how I could arrange that) - and then I suffer through it, realizing that my real life would grind to a halt if I did it.
I've definitely not felt this submissive ever in my life before. I haven't fully accepted yet, but I think I'm getting close. I have moments of submissive bliss, where I don't mind if it's days or hours until I hear from Lady Sin again - where I can accept her schedule, but I still hang on every email, hoping.
Then there are days like today where I have no patience & I get completely frustrated. Lady Sin says that I will grow to completely accept female control, that I will learn to crave it, be addicted to it. That I will feel empty without it. I'm embellishing her words, writing what I heard in my head when I read her words. But she's probably right - even though there's nearly 4 weeks left ahead of me, I'm already thinking about what comes next.
I supposed what comes next depends on some unknown factors.
Will I be able to get a chastity device? That's a big factor. I've been looking at the Birdlocked - not sure if it's right, but looks more comfortable that the CB series.My wife will be the other big factor - will she want me to continue? Will she want a more normal sex life after this 2 month change? Or will she enjoy this new paradigm enough to continue? She really has no interest in teasing me, so if we continue this lifestyle, I'll want to continue working with YourOrgasmIsMine.
The final factor is Lady Sin herself - would she have plans to take this further? If I was willing to pay to extend this experience, would she be able to? Would she want to hand me off to someone else every couple months? Would I want that? These are all things I'll have to discuss with her once this experience is over - and once I know what direction I'm going in.
I have to admit: the idea of indefinite orgasm control is both scary and incredibly exciting.
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